Thursday, April 28, 2005

WAITING, Waiting, waiting . . .

It has been forever since I have written anything on my blog. I just need to say that I am doing fairly well, but am very busy. I am trying to get everything ready only to wait on the Lord to bring in enough partners on board to allow me to get to Poland. I am learning a lot about myself and how aggressive my plan has really been in getting over to Poland. I think that I knew the plan was aggressive and was hoping that God would meet that aggression. Well, He is not and I am a bit frustrated with being frustrated in that fact, but bottom line is that I am okay with not leaving right now.

I am not okay with putting things I need to do off like I have been. I am really seeing how the procrastination part of my personality is coming out. It is good for me to see but at this point I am not quite sure what to do about it.

This week is the Josiah Venture conference and I am sad that I am not there and am sure that this is a huge reason for my down feelings. Also it is very cloudy today and I am tired.

Please pray that God will continue to bring more partners to me both for prayer and for finances. I am not doubting in anyway, just a bit sad that I am not in Poland right now. I do know that once I get there, I will have a time of wondering if I can do this thing called “missions”.

God is good. His love is never ending and He is in charge of my everyday. I do not what to do anything or go anywhere without His guidance.

His grace is sufficient even for one who wants things to go faster than maybe they should. ☺

He wants me here in Colorado for something and I am not sure what it is. I am feeling so useless now that I am just trying to get to Poland and not helping others. I just don’t know what to do. Lord, show me what You want me to see! It is all about you, Lord! Show me the part you want me to play in Your story right now.

So here you have it. A bit of everything when it comes to emotions. I told you that I would tell you the glory and the gory. Here you have a bit of both. ☺

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